I don’t really have anything to say

except.. FJDIOAPGHEAF HERADKFJAKKG BLAAAAAAHHH

I AM SO stuck in the mud right now. No motivation. Just want summer school to be over. And pretty bleh about school starting like a week later.

Honestly I think I’ve had a bit of a taste of what it’s like to never have a summer like you used to back in the old days. More because of my living by myself status. It’s great when I meet up with people, but it gets pretty freakin lonely when I’m in this giant room with no one else in it.

Seriously, I’ve been talking to lapie like its no one’s business. Lapie is probably sick and tired of hearing me talk. SIIIIIIGHHH I want my roomies back like nobody’s business….I NEEED HUMANS!!!!

thank you and good bye.

I really REALLY should be studying. But I just don’t find LIGHT DEFRACTION ALL THAT INTERESTING.

Ok ok, I’ll quit with the caps now…but yeah that’s how I’m feeling right about now =_=

I don’t usually update twice in a day… but this has been a reoccurring thing. Every Friday.

I wake up late on Friday (woke up at 11:50 today) and I make up my mind to get a lot of work done. I end up just doing random things like blogging and writing other things…..and it’s 10:30 now.

MAN! I mean it doesn’t happen the Fridays before my tests because I’m studying. But I just had a midterm last week and now I’m just chilling like majorly.

sigh. We’ll see how things go tomorrow, I mean I’ve had an excellent relaxing day, but I really would have liked to study. Well, maybe I wouldn’t have liked to per say, but I should have ><

Brian “Head” Welch the lead guitarist of Korn…

…is my spiritual brother.
His testimony made me shed a few tears. He and I are probably…the farthest apart, like completely light years apart in personality. Our lives are just so different!!

And yet, I have so much in common with him, I’d seriously love to meet this guy. He’s so intimidating and…is just totally not who I would expect to be a believer. Like… throughout the video (ugh I’m ashamed a little) I was just trying to listen as hard as I could to find something that would be insincere about his speech. But, his words and the way he spoke…none of this was how a crazy heavy metal guy would speak about God normally in my possibly wrong and stereotype influenced opinion.

What made me start tearing up… was what he said happened right after he accepted Christ. He went home, plopped his daughter in front of the TV and prepared a line of crystal methamphetamine and snorted it. Sat there and prayed. What happened after was life changing. He just threw out his drugs and quit Korn.

Anyway this is a good transition into that sermon I heard last week that was so good. The passage was about how Jesus healed a man afflicted with leprosy.
Well, here’s a bit of a history lesson. Leprosy in the ancient times was a death sentence and basically you were isolated outside of the city and if anyone approached someone with leprosy, the leper would have to shout “Unclean! Unclean!” Leprosy is a infection skin disease that basically eats away at your flesh and it can be years until you die. Prolonged exposure to a leper would cause you to be infected with it as it was contagious. So having leprosy meant complete isolation for the rest of your life, and it was against the law for you to contact anybody. If you were seen in the public, it was ok for people to kill you on the spot because people were so afraid of this disease. There was also a stigma related to the disease that it was a curse from God.

So the passage, Luke 5:12 on.. is about a leper who comes close to Jesus and asks to be healed.
What touched me most and convicted me most… was when the preacher said that in order for the leper to come to Jesus and be healed…he had to sin. He had to break the law! He says to Jesus – if you are willing, you can make me clean. Jesus replies – I am willing! He touches the guy and instantly he’s healed. Mind you… leprosy is a disease that destroys your flesh, so the guy was probably nasty smelling and covered in dried blood or pus. Not only is the guy physically unclean, he’s probably spiritually unclean as he hasn’t been able to go to the temple and worship like everyone else for countless years! Jesus doesn’t care, he touches him and heals him completely. New skin. Restored life. Jesus then asks the guy to fulfill the process of presenting himself in front of a priest to be pronounced clean and offer the necessary sacrifices as detailed in Leviticus.

It was just amazing to remember that we all come to know the Lord in sin. You don’t clean yourself up to come to him…you don’t try to be a better person, you can’t do anything to “prepare yourself” to ask for forgiveness. You go to God as yourself, as you are. Just like the leper. Just like this guy Brian. He prayed as he was high. I’m like… dude what?! Is he crazy?!?! Maybe, but he was sincere. There have been times when I’ve been too afraid to do what he did. Go to God after blatantly sinning. But I have experienced the blessed peace that comes after I just confess and repent. It really is amazing.

Anyway here’s the video. Check it out, it really is intense. I got to it after watching Colt McCoy’s interview. So good!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EOeruTrdF1Q

Dang man! It’s that time of year again!!

I am no longer a teenager! Man, it’s odd to think about how fast the years are starting to go by. I always thought of 21 being a really old age. Mostly…that’s how old Cloud Strife was in Final Fantasy VII when it came out, and because I loved Cloud and Aerith as a pair, I associated the age of 21 as being super mature and ready for love. OH HOW WRONG I AM! Anyway, I’m as old as Tifa was in the game…so not Cloud’s age. Sorry if that confused you 😛

Well I actually started my day this morning at 6 in the morning when I finished my physics homework and made a good-bye card for a friend. Then I couldn’t have asked for a more awesome Lord’s day, a couple very convicting, encouraging and uplifting sermons. Wow. I really want to transcribe the second sermon I heard today. The first one was also good, but I’ll admit I was falling a bit asleep not because it was boring but because I was just tired. But really the second sermon was awesome. Really really awesome. I don’t have time right now to type it up. But I will type it up someday, it was so good.

Anyway, my mom and dad came to visit me yesterday, really good of them to come all the way down just for a day 🙂  I don’t get homesick much, but I do miss my family a lot, so I was really happy about that. We went to Huntington Library and it was sweltering hot there… oh goodness, summer in LA…bring back the cool weather please. And then we went to… Promenade? It’s a Westfield owned mall so think Valley Fair or Oakridge. My parents and I saw Toy Story 3 and I bawled again even without lapie there with me. Then we went shopping, and you know you’re getting older when what you want is cooking ware 😛 So I got some of that, and then went home!

So I’ve had a great day, and I’ll get to end my day with a nice 2 hour Physics review for my midterm on Wednesday. yaaaay.   
Hurray for life!
-carrie

OHHH KAAAYY!!! It has been some time from when I said I would finish the book of Job…but yeah, I’ve read through it, and read some sermons on the book itself. I wouldn’t say that I’ve completely done an in depth, thorough study, (I’m no Johnny Mac man!) But I’m excited to write on what I’ve gleaned from the book. I want this to be as clear as possible so I will probably go through the book again once more quickly and take notes this time 🙂 But I’ve been working on it! So I guess this is my summer goal to get out a good summary of Job.
That and also finish listening to the Resolved conference sermons on Jesus. Awesome stuff really!

But first, I wanted to address some things about church and why it’s so important for me to go. Why a post on the church? Well for the summer, all of the college and young adult Bible studies that are a part of Grace Community Church are now coming together for a “Super Study” and our topic this summer is the importance of the church. I’m really interested because it will deal with things like church membership and church discipline which I never experienced before and I really don’t know much about. (I think the latter one I’m glad I’ve never had to experience!!)

We had the awesome Steve Lawson speak to us, I’ve only heard him from recorded sermons so it was really powerful to hear him speak at our Bible study yesterday. His whole sermon was great, he spoke on Acts 2: 42-47. If you want to see how the first church looked like all those hundreds of years ago, look there. That is what every single Christ centered church should be like.
Anyway, Dr. Lawson talked about a time he was part of a question and answer panel, and someone asked the question, “why do some Christians not experience spiritual growth as they should?” He said that the first thing that came to his mind was first, are these believers a part of a church? If they aren’t, it is no wonder that they aren’t growing when they should be.

I thought about that for a while… and it helped me in a little bit of a different way. I have a church, and I have a great fellowship and wonderful friends from there who I know I can talk to about anything, who selflessly inquire how I’ve been doing expecting to hear a real answer from me and not just a “fine thanks and how are you?”
It wasn’t always like that though… and for some time I’ve been struggling with my feelings for my old home church. Admittedly, they haven’t been the nicest of feelings I have to say, but because of yesterday… I think I’ve reconciled in my heart with those feelings, especially because I realize at the root of those feelings was my own sin and my own pride and selfishness.

I realize that my own lukewarmness when I was growing up was because I did not care to involve myself in the church more than I was asked to. Or more than I felt obliged to. I also didn’t realize the necessity of reading the Bible at an earlier age and that it took a good amount of pleading with me from my older sis to even get me to grudgingly open it. I didn’t seek out accountability partners who could consistently check me and ask about what sins I was struggling with, how my devotions were going. I also slept through the sermons at church (no not once or twice…all the time, every time) so I never submitted myself to the thunder and power of Biblical teaching. I was never awake, so how could I have been convicted by anything?

Thank God that He pulled me out of my immaturity. You know I realize that not everyone was like me, some people just got it! They understood the things that I understand now. I realize that a lot of people grew spiritually a lot faster than I did, and dude that’s just fine. That’s awesome. I’m just thankful that I am where I am now, and that I realize that my spiritual growth isn’t a yay I love God and now I’m just going to sit back and let Him work in my life and I won’t do anything yay! (it wasn’t really like that…) but yeah. It’s so important to be involved in a church. And not just any church, a church like the Acts 2 church. Dr. Lawson made a great analogy. The church is like a barbecue pit. The church members are like the coals…they are on fire for Jesus! But if one of those coals rolls away from the pit and is separated…that coal is going to lose its fire and become cold. Never try to grow spiritually by yourself. You’ll burn out so fast 😦

Anime Expo

I had a great time at Anime Expo… but only because of a few things, and the anime part was not really included so much.

Two years ago I attended Fanime in San Jose and loved it! But somehow I wasn’t as struck by AX as I…thought I would be? I don’t know! Ever since that one fateful summer when I stayed at the Hilton with my mom in Anaheim and I was introduced to AX, which was at the time held at the Anaheim convention center… I always had though AX was the biggest and probably best convention ever! Well, I guess it really was quite grand, and I was so pleasantly surprised with the concert I chose to go to…but other than that and the fact that my friends had come down to the area to cosplay, I wasn’t so interested.

First the good points:
My friends were well received and it was a joy to see them get a lot of respect for their costumes, especially when a photographer commented that he read their blog. That was quite nice, I do hope that they work to get recognized more widely, though that may mean, more money and more con attendance which also means more money. I think cosplay is a huge investment, but if you are talented and really enjoy it (and can pull off the look as well as they do) I think people should do it!  I admire a lot of cosplayers because I really feel it’s the highest form of showing love to your favorite series. Fanfiction is easy to do, tough to be good at, but all you need is a computer and an imagination. Fanart is a little tougher to do, not by much, but also difficult to be good at especially with so many awesome artists on the market. Fanart also could use up some money if you choose to invest in fancy art programs and tablets, but it doesn’t have to be for you to be good. Fan comics (doujinshi) are even better because it combines the two and is more time and money consuming. Cosplay though is a different story. Each costume takes a good chunk of money to make, and the time it takes to make it look good is crazy, and sewing talent is needed dude. I do not have that kind of ability or time, but I greatly respect those who do! So it was great following them around and having people ask them for pictures, it was fun!

I am so glad I chose to attend the May’n and Megumi Nakajima concert. Like no joke. At first I was like, well I don’t want to drop that money if I’m not sure I want to go. But it wasn’t like I didn’t want to go, just that I wouldn’t have anyone to go with. Seriously, I’d be there by myself. But in the end, my love for the Macross Frontier soundtrack won me over and I was like, dude, it’s their first and maybe only time in the U.S. I might as well see them if I’m going to AX anyway. I was not disappointed.
Now the only other concert I’ve been to was Fly to the Sky which was really good! But the live performance was best given by Hwanhee because his voice was awesome. And it was more about the dancing and pleasing the fans and stuff. But wow I was blown away by the awesome talent of May’n and Megumi’s voices, they sound EXACTLY the same as when I hear them in the anime. It was crazy! I loved it though and I was singing along at the top of my lungs and jumping (oh my hips hurt so much today) and yeah I just went insane…
Then… the special secret guest came out… and I had no expectations. I thought ahead of time, maybe Alto’s voice actor? Maybe Maaya Sakamoto? No. Flippin YOKO KANNO walked out on stage and instantaneously I just started going ballistic, screaming Yoko Kanno Yoko Kanno over and over again, because she’s that big of a celeb to me! Oh wow. She even danced around a little, before she started playing the piano as accompaniment to Megumi’s songs.
If you don’t know who Yoko Kanno is, she’s like the Nobuo Uematsu of anime. To me at least. I’m not so much a music connoisseur but, Yoko Kanno is amazing. She’s worked on the Cowboy Bebop soundtrack, Escaflowne as well, of course Macross Frontier as well as others I can’t think of on the top of my mind. But what a treat. What a treat it was. man. those first couple twirls of the piano were enough to steal my heart away. what a treat.

Other than that… I am not too much involved in the anime side of things. I’ve realized I am a manga person. I will read as many series as I can get interested in, and base my anime choices off of the manga that I like. I’m not a drama person either…not a TV person or movie person, or watching stuff person in general at all. And I mean, this convention is named ANIME expo for a reason. So many more anime titles are featured there than manga titles. I think another reason is that when a manga turns popular, it becomes an anime. The anime gives way to product sales, and the popularity booms. If a series begins as an anime, it’s like banking on being popular from the get go. There were 4 really big titles out there that were hugely represented at the convention, Soul Eater, TTGL, Code Geass, and DRRR. None of which I’m interested. All 4 have popular animes out.

So first bad point is that I am really out of touch with the popular series (because the big Shonen Jump titles don’t count!) People don’t seem to like cosplaying the SJ series very much. So I’m really not in the know any more.
Second. I am not a fan of the fans of anime. It’s kind of like my distaste for Twilight. I dislike how Twilight totally revs up the hormones of females of all ages and makes them go into a crazy display of weirdness. I’ll admit, the series is pretty polarizing, and I’m all for supporting couples and stuff… but what Twilight has done to people is scary and a little disgusting. With that said, I will still watch the movies if and only if others will watch it with me. I like laughing 🙂
I digress. As I was milling through the convention, I was not pleased with all the preteen girls in Hetalia costumes screaming obscene comments to one another about crazy stereotypes about certain nations. Honestly I like the idea and concept of Hetalia, but what the fans do with it is also… scary. In general, something I don’t like about cosplay is that people kind of role play and act out stuff they want to see happen in their series. You can use your imagination and think about what crazy stuff can happen. Sure it happens in fanart and fanfiction, but when it’s in public, and people are being obnoxious about it, that is a huge turn off for me.

My final thoughts? I went to see friends, and attend a concert. Two things that can happen without Anime Expo. It was crazy cool to see all the artists (majority asian females haha) because they are on deviantart and I like seeing the actual person! But I usually don’t spend money on impractical things… though this convention was an exception because I actually requested some art from a friend and it turned out so good that I was moved to purchase it.
Unless AX has other events like May’n and Megumi’s concert this will probably be my last time attending. Fanime though is a maybe. It provides just as good a convention experience as AX imo, and it’s closer to home, cheaper, and more friends can go.

Time to cook!

SO! I’ve been living on my own for 6 weeks now… and I’d like to discuss my journey in the culinary arts 😀

Well basically I cook one dish that lasts me up to 4 dinners, and I only have 3 recipes under my belt…and it’s actually more like 2 since I finished off the last of my curry paste.

I honestly want to smack anyone in the face that disses Parkside dining hall because what they provide is a heck of a lot better than anything I can come up with at the present. I love Parkside, and I will love it forever. That place was the best dining hall ever. I ate something different every day! I mean come on, endless food! Whenever you wanted to eat! I could eat at 4:30 pm and be done by 5. Now it takes me a minimum of an hour and a half to cook, eat, and clean.

Now, it’s not a problem that I eat basically the same thing 3-4 days a week, I don’t mind it at all actually! It’s funny though how far I’ve come concerning my eating habits. A long long time ago, I hated onions. I hated carrots, and I hated rice without sauce. I also wasn’t too fond of garlic. Like if you had asked five year old Carrie what she would have liked her mom to make for dinner, probably the blandest piece of meat with no fat, cooked completely through and through would have been the best so that she wouldn’t waste anything. It’s interesting how all those hated ingredients have become the stuff I use to cook with EVERY MEAL. haha. If it’s pasta I use that, stir fry you bet, curry can’t have it without.

I guess you could say that though my tastes have expanded, I’m not crazy for different flavors or different cuisines. Oh sure I’d love to eat dim sum or have the best Italian food ever. But I honestly could live off of a few foods if I really really had to. And…I really really had to these past two weeks because I didn’t really have time to make myself food x)

#1 Peanut butter sandwiches
First things first. 4 years of high school. 4 years of pb&j sandwich lunches. I can do without the jelly, actually my elementary school years featured only pb sandwiches. (huh middle school was the only time I actually bought lunch at school!) Well honestly. Give me a loaf of really good, soft, non-grainy bread and a jar of peanut butter and I will go to town.

#2 Fruit
Doesn’t matter what kind, I love every and all fruits. I haven’t met one I didn’t like. But preferably the kinds that aren’t primarily acidic.

#3 Bread rolls and butter
Yeah this sort of overlaps with the first one, but I mean like Hawaiian bread rolls, or dinner rolls, or like the kind that comes out before your dinner…I LOVE bread.

So there you have it. If I had no access to a heat source I could use for cooking, this is what I would live off of. Fruit, bread and spreads.

By the way I did fine in Physics A, praise God! I did well enough to maintain my science GPA, let’s just put it that way. I also did better on the final than I did on both of the midterms! So…I’m pretty thankful and happy. I’ve been taking it pretty easy though, I mean I could describe the rest of my life in these past two weeks, but I would then be bragging…anyway that will change by Saturday after the Spain v. Paraguay game. haha 😀 Gotta get in a little bit of a break before the horror begins again.